Lucky to be your parents!

We get to enjoy you
We get to be there for you
We get to take care of the most precious thing on earth to us.


As someone once said

a baby is no choice
a baby is no accident

a baby is a blessing

we are lucky

to be your parents

The Pain of Parenting

You constantly worry about them
Your heart aches for them
You constantly think of how you could have done something better for them
Your heart misses them the moment they walk out the door

You try to get creative about making them happy
You try to give them what they will eat well
You care for them like you could lose them tomorrow

You love them like you have never loved before
You want back from them nothing more than them having a successful life and afterlife

and That is the Agony of parenthood...

Life is Priceless. Love is not just an emotion.

A baby is one of the most beautiful things that can happen to anyone. Every ounce of him is innocent, pure and sinless. He barely even knows that he exists. He will never know ho much we worry for his safety and how much we go through between now and him turning 5. Love is such an undefinable thing and you only understand its true meaning when you are a parent because you are willing to sacrifice anything and everything for him.

we completed four months outside!

Masha Allah

Today Moosa had his first solid meal. It was rice cereal with banana and apple by Gerber. After making some funny faces that looked like he was tasting the most bitter thing in the world he finally learned how to work it down. It was a moment of celebration for me.

I agree

http://www.popsugar.com/moms/Covering-Up-When-Breastfeeding-37695809

My first born turns 8 - This is for her

Masha Allah! Children tell the time.
8 years ago I was just a young obnoxious person who thought I knew everything about life. But I knew exactly how much I didn't know, when you were born.
I remember daddy struggling through a diaper change in the hospital. I remember looking into your tiny face and wondering how wonderful it was to hold you for the first time. Umama and Appa were on top of the moon. They had just become grandparents. They spent the whole night in the hospital so excited and overjoyed. Daddy buckled you into your car seat and you seemed so tiny in it. There was a snow storm that cold December winter day in Wisconsin. I was too busy looking at you and didn't notice any of the beautiful deco outside the car window. We came to chocolates in our beds, beautiful baby deco and greeting cards. Aadil maaama was also there excited as ever, but too scared to hold you. It was the best moment of our lives Ever since, we have been celebrating parenthood - both the good days and the bad.

Yes, we have made mistakes. We are human. You will be a mom one day and make mistakes too. You will realize what a tough job parenting can be. But you will love it nevertheless.

Today is about you. You have such a kind heart. You have an excellent memory and beautiful imagination You were writing your own books since you were five, You were reading since you were three. You are just perfect but you know what?

Even if you were not good at anything, even if you were not as smart as you are, we would still love you. Parents love their children, no matter what. We will always love our one and only sweet daughter. May Allah make you path beautiful and may you make a positive difference in this world!

Love always
Mommy, Daddy, Haroon and Moosa!
(Hope you liked the little surprise in your lunch box today)

4 months in a week! Yay!

So Moosa has been an extremely good baby Masha Allah. He and I are bonding while we establish a routine and set expectations for each other. 4 Months is big because we can start cereal! Can't wait cos that means I can leave him for more than just a couple of hours if I have to run any errands.

I fell sick a couple of weeks ago and it was hard. Not just the physical challenge of having to run the house and stay sane with the three but also the overbearing thought of having to take antibiotics and not breastfeed Moosa for ten days. As many moms who exclusively breastfeed their children will understand, ts very hard to not feed your baby and watch them cry in hunger. Moosa is adamant on No formula. so were my other kids. The fear that I may get worse, the fear that the children may catch it. The fear of anything containing germs getting anywhere near the baby was taking a toll on me.

My congestion and headache was getting worse. I then got a bad toothache which made me rush to the dentists office with an emergency appointment. The dentist asked if I had sinus issues because she found nothing wrong with my teeth, thankfully. I said 'yes'. For some reason she prescribed amoxicilin which of course I never bothered to go get.
I thought I should see my physician if I get any worse. I did. I had a sinus infection which the doctor said was very bad. I was prescribed Augmentin 875 mg every 12 hours for 10 days and a saline nasal spray. The co-pay alone for the antibiotic was $35. No breastfeeding. I put the bottle of pills on the counter top and stared it. Many times, before I left to the doctors I was contemplating on whether I actually needed to go because I was feeling better than I did a day ago. Lets just get it checked out since I have some time today, was my thought process. It was a very windy day and I was worried about parking and walking with Moosa because I did hear a slight wheeze from him. I called the pediatricians. Both pediatricians on duty told me that Augmentin was ok while breast-feeding. One told me to take plenty of probiotics which was great advice. To me, this doesn't really make sense because there will be an unnecessary war going on in my body. I did some research online and then called my gynecologist who also said its safe. I checked with my brother who is final year med student. At this point I had already taken one pill. He said he would advice me not to just in case the baby had diarrhea and got dehydrated. The pharmacist also said it was not the safest. I was getting paranoid. Within 30 minutes of taking Augmentin I both threw up and also had loose motion. All day despite many visits to the bathroom my stomach felt awfully weird. Moosa just wouldn't take any formula. So I had to nurse him praying the whole time that he would be ok. Reading drug facts online was the last thing you want to do but I did and I bumped into this article by chance CDC: http://www.cdc.gov/getsmart/community/for-patients/common-illnesses/sinus-infection.html

I decided immediately that, that was it for me. Yes I know its bad to stop once you have started but I though one pill can't help or harm me. Better stop now rather than 3 days later so gave I it up and I'm glad I did. Little by little my symptoms were disappearing. I inhaled steam and had the humidifier on 24 hrs. Before I knew it, I was on a journey towards recovery. I was able to sleep peacefully and wake up without feeling heavy in y head. I am thankful to Allah for helping me recover without antibiotics It could have been a lot worse and  may have just got lucky but I have always been phobic about medicine and I guess this time it helped me.

Babies are irresistible!

We live in an age where people ask us or give us looks about having a third child. They seem to be thinking in their heads - weren't two babies enough for them? No, two's not enough!

He's a third born not a sixth born and if it was a little easier we'd probably do it all over again in a heart beat. (And families with six or more children raising them right - I have every ounce of respect left in me, for you!)

We want to adopt more kids and thats only because my severe nausea and extremely difficult pregbabcies makes it harder for me to physically have more. We love children. Yes like all parents we hate the troubles that comes with it but at the end of the day when you tuck them into their beds and put your head down you know you secretly miss them. Their millions of questions, their innocent eyes and naughty faces. Everything in the world makes it worth that feeling.

Moosa is our miracle baby. The doctor was not sure about how things looked at our first scanning. She said she saw a shadow and that if somethings wrong she will have to terminate my pregnancy. I came home that day very quiet - very unlike me. I said to my husband, you know if this doesn't work out I am not having another baby. He became very sad. I said to him that I just can't take the heartache of losing a child even before birth. I couldn't go through a termination and have one more baby.... at the time I felt like I just couldn't. Of course it turned out that nothing was wrong and everything was more than fine but I still remember my heart sinking when the dr said "For the moment you are still pregnant - so congratulations!"

Yes babies come with a lot of responsibility and hardship. Those challenges are there so we know we are really ready for it and truly want to bring one more good human being to the world. Like right now, I'm forced to type with just one hand but who knows? He just might make the next discovery that saves the world!

Love you Moosa and without you we would never be complete!

The Journey Towards a Name~

Finding a name for our third baby was the most difficult mental challenge during my 38 week pregnancy. Every name was either taken, or not good enough. One night I said to my husband "What do you think of the name "Abdullah Moosa" and he said "yes"

Prophet Moses was the brother of Prophet Aaron. Since we had named our son Haroon after my late father-in-law we decided to name them both after the infamous brothers who confronted the mighty Pharoah. I hope their story will inspire our boys and that they will both live up to their names!

3.5 moths! Yay!

Its two weeks since my parents left and it has not been easy without them. Apart from being unable to cook or take a shower in peace, just the ability to stay sane and look normal is increasingly challenging. Moosa on the other hand has become a very social baby. Seems to be making friends and smiling at everyone. No matter how sad or upset I am. when he smiles at me there is nothing I can do to avoid smiling back at him. Love him to the ocean and back. Even a simple errand like going to grocery store or getting a dental checkup done has become so difficult. I am truly helpless and I cant imagine how single mums do it alone. May God bless them!

I wish my parents could have stayed a bit longer. This is life and it must  go on.... Let me write later when I can think in peace....

I started the pacifier officially for Moosa today. it was like a breath of fresh air. I don't have to be a human pacifier any more, That sounds evil doesn't it. He is Masha Allah way above the charts in his weight. With all the vomiting we are pleased. He was so tiny when he came out. And he wasn't eating like the others. Also I had trouble nursing him which I didn't have with the others.

The problems with the pacifier

• I don't know if he has eaten enough. I can't quite tell if he is actually hungry or he is passionately sucking just to satisfy the uncontrollable urge to suck.
• it keeps dropping so i have to get back up and keep putting it back in
• guilt - what if starts losing weight, then gets to 15 and blames me for his awful looking set of teeth?
• What if it delays speaking?
• What extensive studies have been done about this age old method of pacifying babies?
• Will we be able to quit ?

http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/infant-and-toddler-health/in-depth/pacifiers/art-20048140

I am not sure if I will continue it but I guess its worth a try. We shall find out!

eight in eight days

Our first born is turning 8. Memories of packing her tiny body into a car seat on a cold winter night and bringing her home to her new grandparents are slowly fading away. Its been a roller coast ride. Its been mostly good days with her. She's a wonderful little girl who lights up our lives. I miss the times we spent together, cuddling for our afternoon naps till daddy got home. I miss her baby eyes and super soft skin. Yeah they will never be babies again. Jannah is Masha Allah a very bright student.

Happy 8th Birthday to my darling! I love you more than all the planets and the sun and the moons put together.