All about the baby and a little more!

Friday, April 26, 2019

Larger families are nicer - The pros and the cons

I always wanted more siblings. If it was any easier I would do it in a heart beat. Yeah we would absolutely love one or two more around so I can get a complete work out.

Here are the pros:

Life is interesting... there is always something happening with someone at some time or the other. Free time becomes more valuable and hence more productive. You feel satisfied and fulfilled that you are doing something with your life.

It becomes easier - You have to trust me on this. The older kids take on some responsibilities. The younger ones can be attended to by the older siblings. Someone can read them a story and someone else can feed them or tuck them in if they want some pampering. You don't have to do it all. The younger ones and have more examples to follow and the older ones become a second set of parents which is just beautiful to watch.

Cleaning up becomes second nature - Human beings are messy. We collect clutter, we spill crumbs... we procrastinate .... in a family of six or seven, everyone has to clean surfaces that they use as they go because putting off cleaning for later means having to clean up a bigger mess.

It's a play date and a sleep over every day - Its a party every day. With the challenges come the lighter moments, the fun, the giggling, the secrets and the noise - yes quiet time has to be scheduled in.

The kids are more understanding - They know that you have to spread yourself out thin so they learn patience, they learn to wait for their turn, they are more forgiving and loving. It's not all about them and time has to be shared among everyone just like everything else.

You almost always have a soft and cuddly baby in the house for everyone to fuss over. I cant get enough of the baby skin and wobbly thighs. The giggles are just out of this world. its worth the pain. its worth the scribbles on the wall. There's always someone to play tag with and the laughter and joy brings such a good feeling to wake up to.

The older kiddos will buckle in the younger ones so all you have to do is drive. That's pretty nice.

When they are older  they have each other to turn to. You know they wont be alone and that they will always be there for each other. You just have to make sure that you raise them right and fill their hearts with love.

You are at peace - When you are old, there are more people to take care of you, more grands and when you die you have more people to pray for you.

You can save a bit on the taxes and you get a lot of love from society. People empathize with you. They offer help even without you having to ask.

Cons

Its is complicated no doubt - each child is a different age and have different emotional needs. You have to switch tone and expressions depending on the child you are dealing with and sometimes you are too exhausted for all that processing.

Its hard to give quality one on one time - Dad finds a way to this but for mum sometimes its hard to do this every day. Mum is usually the one cleaning up after dinner and putting the babies down so dad does the tucking in. Its a wonderful time to catch up in the days events and to dream together for the future but mum doesn't always get a big share of this time

Outings are like field trips - you have to count everybody in and hold everyone's hands or use a buddy system.

Crossing the street is a nightmare Yup... you have to look left, right center, backwards and forwards at the same time while carrying one, holding the other and hoping to God that the others will just follow.

Wednesday, January 16, 2019

One

What an year it has been!

We had sleepless nights
We had world war three to change diapers and put car seat belts on
We had fights
We had challenges that we thought we would never get through
We had fevers, frightening coughs, never ending runny noses
We

but we had

we had you

you made us laugh
you brought us joy

Your sense of humor and your angry crawl is a delight to watch

We love you buddy... You made us realize that yes we can do it

Wednesday, December 19, 2018

That first week of your life seemed to last forever. I can’t believe how fast this month with you has passed. I’m so lucky to have you. You are home and safe. It’s a terrible flu season that you were born into and I’m always afraid that you will catch some bug.

I’m not quite sure if it’s me or motherhood but I have to be protective of you. I am overly protective of you getting hurt something falling on you giving you gripe that maybe dangerous to you. Everything is harder


My job

Dear oldest,

My job here is not to be loved by you, my job is not to be your best friend.... My job is one thing and one thing only and that is to raise you right.

You can cry and you can be hurt and that's ok if it means teaching you right from wrong. It is not ok to do some things you did.

~~~

My oldest turned 11, 11 days ago. We were lucky to have guests staying over to make a home made cake from scratch. A terribly challenging year in which some of the needs of the older kids got swept under the rug. The younger ones took the front burner for a while and yes it probably was not fair.

Life is not fair and it never will be, in our eyes at least. Our children need to learn that early. God does not have to explain his purposes.

When the whole family was put on tami flu for 5 days, I knew that the next few days will be a night mare but what I didn't expect was for the oldest to be the fussiest of the lot. She started being stubborn about not taking it and we had to put on an electronic ban. So the water works began. I end with the same statement... I love you with all my heart... but I have only one job towards you and i damn better get it right because i only get one chance at it.

Love always,
your mum!


Thursday, October 18, 2018

Eesa completed 9 months of his existence outside the womb two days ago. He started crawling a couple of days before that. Hopefully, less crying as he recovers from a cold. Moosa has been on the ipad less this week. We played multiple games. It was lovely having family from Sri Lanka specially for the children.

Thursday, July 19, 2018

My Darling Eesa

About time I wrote to you.

You turned 6 months a few days ago. You are so adorable and your unique qualities are slowly emerging. I cant help but wonder how you all will get along as adults. When you are old enough to read this I will probably have grey hair and wrinkles... I may not even be a round. All i want is to raise my children right. Today I read that having more children reduces the risk of breast and ovarian cancer in females. Parenting is truly a privilege and not everyone can have it. Since your dad lost a brother and had to grow up alone he knows the value of a brother. Since Jannah and I have no sisters... lol we really don't know... Ok so that's me waddling on... If I am old and grey be patient with me... If I ma not around... be wise in what you do and be your best inside and out. Take care of each other. Seize opportunities... More than anything hold on to your salah and forgiveness!

Saturday, April 7, 2018

I'm guessing that people are assuming that we couldn't get enough of all the cuteness and craziness that we decided to roll the dice a fourth time. Sometimes we get curious stares, sometimes we get asked down right straightforward if baby number 4 was planned. We love a large family and have enough love and food to go around. If it is shocking to have four babies in 2018, you should take a closer look at the world. Medical science and mortality rates are improving. Yes global warming does exist but we also need more smart people to make smarter choices to reduce the crisis. We need ideas. We need implementation and the aliens are not going to do it for us. We need people!

Yes its hard now... tear jerking cute moments make up for the endless night cries... puke on our clothes... arms hurting, no break, no movies...

Prayers for better days soon!