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Top Ten Ways to Teach Values to Your Kids

How can you teach values to your kids? Here are ten ideas to help you:

1. Tell them your life stories and teach through your stories

Kids love to hear stories about your childhood. Weave in some moral dilemmas, and you’ve got great opportunities to teach them values. It’s especially effective at bedtime, when there are fewer distractions. They’ll fall asleep with the story swirling around inside them.

2. Live your own life according to your values—walk the talk.

Kids learn by imitating, especially at a young age. They’re very adept at seeing the match between what you say and what you do. Don’t give them confusing signals; follow your own values every moment.

3. Expose them to your religion, faith, or spirituality

It seems especially important to let your kids know they’re not alone. Guiding your kids towards your faith or spiritual beliefs will strengthen their values, and provide parents with a framework for their life.

4. Pay attention to who else might be teaching values to your kids

Get to know your child’s teachers, coaches, friends, etc. Anyone who spends time with your children may be influencing them. Know their values and beliefs as well.

5. Ask your kids questions that will stimulate dialogue about values

Telling your kids what values they should have won’t be very effective, especially when your kids get older. Asking them “curious” questions will allow discussions that will eventually lead to values. “What did you think about that fight?” will be more effective than, “He shouldn’t have started that fight!”

6. Talk to them about values in a relaxed and easy way

Nothing will turn your kids off more than preaching values to them after they’ve screwed up! Talk to them when everyone’s relaxed, and do it in a light, conversational manner. Be aware of using the “parental tone,” which has your kids wanting to run for the door.

7. Limit their exposure to TV and video games

One of the ways to teach values to your kids is by showing them what you avoid. Advertisers in the US will be spending over 3 billion dollars to try and convince your kids that they’ll feel better if they have the right clothes, etc. If you really want to show them there are more valuable ways to spend your time, limit your own TV watching as well.

8. Involve your kids in helping others

Kids learn values when they experience them. Allow them to experience helping others by donating a portion of their money to the needy, or by getting involved in charity work. When your kids can see first-hand the results of their efforts, an important value will be established for a lifetime.

9. Have frequent conversations about values in your household

Don’t make the mistake of only talking about values when something goes wrong. Your kids need to hear your values reflected often in conversations. It’s another way for them to know that it’s important.

10. Have high expectations for your kids’ value systems

Your kids will tend to rise to the level of your expectations. Their value system will often reflect yours, as long as you expect them to make it an important part of their life. When your kids are making a decision, ask them to consider how their decision fits into their own value system.

Datha, Dear Datha!

The past few months brought some twists and turns in her life but don't we all have those? She turned three on the 9th of December. It has been an unbelievingly amazing journey for everyone who so dearly loves her. Six months ago she got the chance to meet her maternal grandparents for the second time. The last time they saw her was when she was a baby just like her brother is now. She has a wonderful time with her grandparents who loved her to pieces. She grew very fond of them and hardly spent a minute without them. We also made a trip back home where for the first time she met and made friends with many of our relatives.

On the down side we also began to see many unnecessary temper tantrums. May be it was the terrible twos or may be it was the coming of a new baby brother or may be the spoiling of the grandparents or all three of those combined but Jannah was becoming somewhat difficult to handle. We thought we had the perfect daughter until she started wanting to do things by herself and then got very angry when she was not able to or someone tried to help her. We told ourselves it was passing phase and dealt with it patiently. We had to send her on time out and we used the count down method which both worked well in winning herself back.

She is now slowly coming back to being the sweet child she used to be same time last year. Lovable, kind, polite and extremely adorable. She chats and talks all the time. When haroon cries she comes running to rescue and entertains him - a great little helper for me. She is very gentle and loving towards him. She is awfully fond of her dada but is also quite a mama's girl. She doesnt really like nap time and is a less fussier eater than what she used to be.

The toilet nightmares and temper tantrums are finally ending and she is doing good with her counting and social skills. She cracks us up all the time with the things she says. A very happy and content child who is slowly growing into her girlhood is emerging from this baby faced angel. Very soon she will be independent and will grow out of her childish habits but our love for her will always be fresh in our hearts... as fresh as it was the day she was born..

and I have to thank God everyday for the two! They mess up your home big time but beautify your life in ways that are unimaginable... Alhamdulillah!

six months in three days!

I am guilty of not writing up enough updates about my boy. When you have two kids to manage you end up being really busy all the time. I could have made some time for this though which is why I feel bad. He turns six months on Jan 8^th and I turn 27. Wow! Once you become an adult time does seem to run fast. So I'm in my late 20s and yes that is sad but I tell myself that each year we live longer we get closer to dying. And dying does not have to be something to be afraid of depending on how we live our lives.

Haroon has been a wonderful, happy baby. He smiles almost all the time and giggles when you make him laugh. When the world around me goes crazy that beautiful toothless smile seems to appear out of no where as if to say “Its ok mommy, everything will be ok” And I cant help but smile back!

Love is an amazing thing but a mothers love is even more amazing. It is pure and true... giving and giving with no expectation or and no returns at all!

As he rolls over and lifts himself up attempting to crawl... getting about just anywhere he wants to, I can only imagine how much more mobile my life woulg get, running after him trying to keep him safe. More updates on the loving sister will follow when time permits.