Cultivating a culture of chaos

As a family we always try to turn up on time for events and invitations. Yes inevitable last minute things do happen but we try to start early and leave room for any unexpected events, getting gas or closed roads. When we go late for everything we are teaching our kids that its ok to be late that its ok not to respect another person's time.'

If you want to have a generation that is productive and efficient then teach them to start on time. Life is time. Some people justify going late by saying that everyone is late or that the event will not start on time anyway... This is not good at all. All events should start on time. Specially ones that involve children. Let late comers pay the price. Waiting for them, only encourages them to be late next time.

Also if you are inviting people over try to give them a time that is both reasonable for you and works for them. Before you have your dinner guests over you could ask them what times work well for them and fix a mutually convenient time that does not stress either party. I don't like events that are set at an earlier time just so that people will come half our late. Time is life and respect it. Don't have some one wasting their life waiting for you!

Grocery shopping with the kids can be a very good educational experience for them.

When taking the kids grocery shopping I try to have them work with a budget so that they can learn to spend according to their means. For example we tell them that they can get what they want as long as its within this range: say $5 or $7. If they don't find something for the allocated amount they learn to settle for less or do without it. This way they know they can't just get anything that costs any amount. They are usually allowed one snack per week and a drink or juice. Entertainment shopping which involves stuff like pokeman cards and fancy stationery or books can only be done a couple of times a year usually before festivals and special occasions. Its not about being able to afford but its about having self control, being financially intelligent and practically implementing math. Never avoid taking kids on a shopping spree that they can learn a lot from. Involve them. Get them to help. Get them to look for the best deals and before you know, they'll be doing your shopping for you. This can alsp be done together online.

They can also looks for earth friendly items that use less paper and plastic or use recyclable items.

The Red light to nurse

One of the most difficult things fro me to do as a mother is to stop nursing my youngest. The very thought, brings me tears... He cant understand why he has to go through this and I cant explain it to him... I just have to let him cry it out and it is as hard for me as it is for him. He will be two in four more months. I try to remember the freedom that the weaning off gave me. Being able to go wherever  and wear whatever...

As people start enlarging their eyes when I tell them I'm still nursing my toddler, I feel sad. Its such a blessing... I would admire someone for their patience... People think its easy. Let me tell you, its not...

You almost never get a good night's rest
You are hot and sweaty
You are in pain even when you are not nursing
You have to hold another person who is pretty heavy and be sure not to drop them.
You have to work around a toddlers schedule and be able to interrupt any thing you do any time, for them
You are hungry or thirsty all the time
You are tired and nobody understands why, because they don't see you running a marathon
You hate those who make it trivial


So if you see someone who is selfless enough to nurse, stop and appreciate them for a minute. Encourage them and be happy for them. It is the least you could do!

Only Girls

So, when you have only one daughter, its kind of sad because you have to get rid of all the cute outfits that have been outgrown without being able to pass it down to a sister. You wish you could have more and then get a reality check about how hard it is to go through the whole process and raise them right. Then you think about adoption and then you are bombarded with a thousand opinions or so and you go back to being content with what you have... I was an only girl and never new what it was like to have sisters. Large families always seem like a lot of fun and have extra blessings