Time doesn't fly cos it's trapped in a rocket!

Last year around this time my parents were here and I had just had a baby. Life had taken a new twist. Challenged by parenthood and living in a foreign and stranged land that had four seasons I thought there wasn't much to look forward to.

Today... I feel like with my little family I have come a long way. We have been living all by ourselves with no help since may. the baby has been doing fine Masha Allah... my cooking has greatly improved... we are comfortable hosting large gatherings, having overnight guests with no fuss, and even making long road trips with a baby and her elderly great grandma and I feel like I''ve achieved much more in the past few months than ever before. When my parents and brother left me here and went back I felt as though my whole world had fallen part but thank fully with bru and little J and the help of the Almighty we have made it a long way...  and as they say "A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step!"

Here is the note I wrote to my family after they left: 

To a Very Dear Family

 

Six months ago on a cold winter Friday afternoon, you entered this house to be welcomed by our cheer and biriyani from the mosque. The house was colourful and full of life and sound, but today it is bear with a deafening silence that I cannot explain in words.

 

The kitchen is empty and your bedroom is gloomy with the blinds drawn down. Mum has not only taught me to do things efficiently and economically but also prepared food for the next week or two until I adjust into the loneliness. I have never missed home so much before. Izada aunty left me a kind note on skype and then called later to check on us. Ahsen was there sharing his many words of wisdom with me. Shafi periappa chatted with me till late night. Barushan and Jannah were around with me always. Fea datha reassured me saying that I will meet them soon and yeah with each day I will get closer to seeing you all again Insha Allah. Even umama called from Sri Lanka and advised us. All this made the pain easier. But it will never completely go away. A comfortable life with all needed facilities, the pool, the gym, the flowers and green of the garden - but none of that can replace the joy that only family brings. I will be so lonely now… Just Jannah and I in the mornings. She is sleeping in her crib right now as I type this and I fear to leave her alone to go shower as there is now no one that would run to her the moment she makes a twist or turn. Dada, I am greatly indebted to you, to the kindness you have shown and the lessons you have thought me during the stay here. You even made tea, barushan's breakfats and washed dishes which was much much more than what a dad should be doing. Mama and dada thanks for helping me to fill Jannah's Sri Lankan citizenship form and get everything in order. We decided that we will send it next week Insha Allah in case we want to travel during the weekend and may need our passports.  Aadil, the vacuum cleaner and stationery remind me of you. Should I mention the TV also? I don't even feel like watching it without you around. Thanks so much for helping with throwing out the garbage, washing the bathrooms and carrying the stroller and car seat in and out all the time everywhere we went. I hope you will take good care of mum, dad and yourself as you are the only one there with them now. Don't let mum and dad worry over you. I know you are going through a difficult period in your life. Trust me, it will go away soon. There are a million more things that you all have done for me and one mail cannot cover it all…!

Ashen, as you close your eyes in a land faraway dealing with the everyday campus issues, books and exams I'm wishing that all of us will be able to meet soon Insha Allah. Growing up together and being so faraway from one another is hard. Hope the parcel with goodies made its way without much of a problem. We were kind of worried that it may have got lost because of the small mistake in the address. Although you were not here with us, your turn wont be very faraway. Your presence was very much felt everyday thanks to msn and chat on your phone. 

Again, dear family your kindness has meant so much to me in the past half year. I am sorry if I have hurt or wronged you all in anyway. Sometimes it's when we part that we realize how much we take for granted. Here's thanking you all…! It's time now for me to sale on with this little family of mine. We will be ok Don't worry. It can't be rocket science. Everyone does it. But yeah… we'll manage somehow. As I take to my flight with my new wings, please pray that Allah will help us all through the journey and when we meet again Insha Allah let's rock as we always do!

Salaams

Aashika

What my dad wrote about me!

I will always be their baby! :)

Vaccinations and Tests! Again!

I know I promised myself I’m closing up this blog. It was supposed to be just from conception to baby’s first year. But today was Jannah’s vaccination again and she was Masha Allah very brave. Here’s just a few lines to wrap it up!

 

She, my pride hardly even cried

She waved once she was done

Almost like it was fun

I’m happy it went well

She does have a strong will

Oh thank you Allah

For the blessings on her!

For you its just another day but for me its a milestone. Every step you take is a symbol of achievement and sucess even if be little!

Jannah turns 1

I recall my very first appointment with the gynecologist… my fears… my hopes… A million words could not describe the feelings running through a very new mum to be…

The day Jannah was born is still fresh in my mind. I don’t think it will ever wilt away. The ride to the hospital with the broken water and snowy roads. The wheel chair ride up to the room… the cramps and the delivery… then her cry… It was such an amazing experience.

Life gave me a new reason to live for… and even though I had a really difficult pregnancy unable to keep down any food I still think I can do it all over again… Because no matter how hard it is, the reward is great and beyond what anyone can express! The joy is unimaginable until its felt!

So..

Happy Birthday Dear Darling

And many more wonderful years to come!

You will always be special in the hearts that love you

You will always be our sweet angel and cuddly baby

Smile at the storms that life throws at you

Ignore the pain – it's not worth it!

Reach for the highest of heavens

And be the best you can be!

Thank you dear Jannah for making our life Whole!

The step of life

Jannah takes her first step

It was another one of those cold winter mornings and J was around with her toys and cheerful smiles when I suddenly noticed her standing unsupported. I never thought it would make me so happy to see her take the first step of life on her own. Well, although he she had no clue what mum’s giggling and cooing was all about, she played along quite well clapping for herself as I cheered. So there she is on her own now….! Trying to find her own little space in the world.

A baby is an amazing miracle of life. An you really don’t know what that means until you have your own….! The whole world takes shape and life has a new meaning… a new reason to live each day to the fullest. J this first year with you has been wonderful and I’m looking forward to many more… Your first word! Your first hop! Your first jump! Your first day to school!

Wrapped in all the emotion is the uncertainilty of what the future holds for you? Will you be a good person and do us proud? Would you be the angel you are now?

Lets wait for time to tell its own tale!

Charles Darwin in sight

First they are in water

A single cell dividing fast

Then they are in land

Just looking around

Then they start pulling themselves on their tummies

And soon the creepers have turned into two legged crawlers

The crawlers on all fours then become climbers

Then the supported walker…

And finally the independent, confident young strider

Marching away

Running into the invisible

Getting everyone to chase

Doesn’t this tell a story of evolution?

A Year in a week!

It’s been a beautiful year!

So your babyhood is done! I remember the last few days of my pregnancy last year with my family. My last few nights of uninterrupted sleep and achy belly kicks. Fears about the birth, reading up on baby care methods and watching tv programs and videos on what to expect. It doesnt seem like long ago.

We were so anxious about her arrival; predicting her looks and preparing her room. Shopping for those cute little outfits and having the bag ready for hospital. 

Today she's a week away from turning one. Unaware of her own little self she creates an atmosphere of cheer and smiles wherever she is... from strangers in the supermarket to cuddly old dad. J has left her footprints in quite a few hearts and she akes her way into childhood, combing mums hair and feeding dad chips i cannnot wait nor can I imagine to see what more impressions she will make. Will her life be filled with every little good thing we want for her? Will she be happy and rock herself to sleep? Will she want her room painted in pink? The answer my friend will come with time and only time can tell!